She's the kind of girl you want so much it makes you sorry; still you don't regret a single day...

This week has been one of the worst. I haven't been that low in quite some time. Two years to be exact.

I added a 31st tally on my right arm a few days ago. I regretted it as soon as I saw myself bleed. I tried to reach anyone. I tried, but no one answered. So much for those people that say, "Call me if you ever need anything. No matter what time it is." I've suddenly stopped believing promises and good intentions. Thank God for Kenny. He was the only one who answered my call. Although not much was said, he still calmed me down. I was so ashamed of myself. Two years down the drain in one swift slice.

Luckily I managed to pull myself out. After talking to Kenny, I didn't hear from anyone for days. It's sad, really. The time when I really needed someone, nobody was there. That honestly sent me further down, and I was in darkness for a few days. I guess it just shows how much I've grown over the years. Two years ago I never would have been able to pick myself up. Now that I can, it makes me wonder who I really need.

Nick is back from D.C. I'm pretty stoked about that. He and I have gone out a few times, and I've really started to like him. He and I liked each other when we were fifteen, and I'm pretty sure he's had a bit of a soft spot for me since then. At any rate, he's asked me out again this week, and I'm excited. He and I have a lot of fun together. :)

I want summer. Now. I'm so tired of this wintery junk. I miss the summer breezes and walking barefoot down the street. I'm going out to California for a few days this summer to visit Kenny. We are SO excited for that. I haven't seen him in almost a year! Uncool. He's a wicked amazing guy, so I'm pretty jazzed about spending some quality time with him around his hometown and San Fran. He's already got a bunch of stuff planned out. Yay!

That's it, really. I'm really looking forward to this week. I'm glad I finally got my laughter back.

Later days.